ever since when i was younger, nobody liked miie, they bullied, whispered slag when they pass by miie and talks behind my back (even my-somehow-called-used-to-be-besties). its so amazing huh, u only remeber bad comments and feelings instead of remembering the good ones. like how we think twice when we forwards a chain mail for god but doesn't think twice on sending bad chain mails.i have this range of bad comment sthat i had encountered and everynight they just come back to haunt miiie. so yeah i have kinda (no gigantic) low self esteem.
I'm not sure or whatever sometimes i wish that i am going to college in UK, earning my own living (no matter how crap the budget is) million and million of miles away from my somehow- called-supportive-family-when-NO-they-r-u'll-never-make-it-cheer. how they moan and groan and scolds (yes i know that its for my own good and i'll thank them when i grow up, BUT NOW IS NOW):
experienced examples by sascha:
grades in school- when parents urged u to get better grades and what your reward will be. i might sound like a spoilt brat in this but in my truth i know that i m not one. instead of u'll make us proud kind of motto they give the u better get good grades motto or u'll have a suspendtion of internet, phone, social and when they say that U-BETTER-GET-GOOD-GRADES-OR-PEOPLEWILL-LOOK-DOWN-ON-MIIE!!!(THEIRSELF) what abt miie huh? ur ticket to admirition??? and i have to study really really hard so that i can stay in this school. for my parents and i made this bargain that if i get more than three Bgrades, i will move to chempaka. when the only reason they want miie to go there is because my cousins who are damn, genius smart (one went to uni in london, and the other getting really really good SPMS).
i remmeber abt last month, went i won 1st in the running race, i was bummed but i know that it wasn't my effort (i know that i won because i had low low compettion). so yeah when i told my parents abt the news. they gib miie the U-CAN-RUN?? motto (the kind that they think that u're lying motto). yeah and daddy will be like that's not important and change into my exam conversation topic. some famous dude quoted saying that ' ONLY SURROUND URSELF WITH PEOPLE WHO ARE GOING TO LIFT YOU HIGHER' Wait a min, they're my parents so WTF?
~~~END OF EXAMPLES~~~
URGH THX ALOT PEEPS FOR MAKING MY LIFE SUCK!!. If u're reading this, u might not know how many people had hurt miie .... (no sympathy needed)
thx god for the down-to-earth friends i have who is supportive and i've known them for years. INcluding mellie too, even though i've only known her this year (not long), she is counted as my sisters adi (a.k.a sisys)
thx for reading and pls comment
negative- welcomed and will be taken in mind
postive- will last for two days and will be ignored so i will jot it down ==
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